Its 10 AM (and not a moment before) the bluster of mowers in various states of readiness, individual timbres dependant on oomph and level of care as one by one they are started up by their owners eager to be the first to begin. Tardiness is considered a sin and any false starts before 10 an unspeakable horror. The importance of a pristine property is as discreet as a flashing neon sign.
An unofficial competition of the tadpole-like cul-de-sac since the houses started popping up like daisies within the newly minted subdivision, ten long years of lawn mowing ago. No one wants to neither be the talk of the various curtain twitchers, the brunt of the passive-aggressive remarks nor be on the receiving end of the surreptitious looks. Like it or not, teeth clenched one must get on with it.
Soaring prices have seen an influx of dual income, time poor individuals who want nothing more than to not join the collective Saturday snarl but in order to avoid not being one of those houses one must get on with it to ensure what is left of the weekend can proceed.
Then there is Ned with a face as long as a narrow winding road in holiday traffic stuck behind a logging truck, procrastination oozing, trudges out to the abode of lawn beautification palaver aka the shed when the epiphany occurred.
Flying back into the house with the speed of a dying holiday, Ned was soon on the blower to Eco Lawn. These hard-working artificial lawn laying professionals understand that hard working people do not need yet another chore eating into whatever time is spare. Their job is to rubber-stamp the weekend in arrestive red – DOWNTIME ONLY!
With no time at all the Eco-Lawn team arrive giving the intermeddling types a right royal eyeful as they rip up the natural and replace it with quality, lush, Eco Lawn grass. Australian made, this stuff is built to withstand climatic changes, errant dog’s droppings and rambunctious rug rats.
It is ten am (and not a moment before) on a Saturday morning; the drone of collective mowers are music to Ned’s ears a superior being sitting on the front porch of his house surrounded by opulent green, sipping his morning coffee, quietly surveying the idiosyncratic beings maintaining their various yards.
Oh yes, the gorgeous green of Ned’s yard now bears the brunt of surreptitious glances, eyes bearing the distinctive green that comes with envy. Their resolve to conform to a standard not of their own making slowly dissipating. The pinnacle of garden perfection need not be achieved by hard work is abundantly clear. It will only be a matter of time before, one by one they succumb to the siren call of the Eco-Lawn artificial green.
It is high time to make those neighbourhood curtain twitchers eat their words with the beautiful Eco Lawn touch.
